If you’re in the midst of planning your wedding, one of the biggest challenges you’re likely to face is who to invite. For most of us, there are limitations to how many people we can afford to invite. Chances are you’re going to have to draw some lines as to who makes the list, and this can become complicated when you’re inviting some coworkers, but not others. If you’d like some help navigating this delicate subject, keep reading to learn some helpful etiquette tips for inviting coworkers to your wedding.
Consider Your Outside Work Relationship
Do you regularly see any of your coworkers outside of work in a social capacity? If so, those would be the coworkers I’d be most likely to focus on finding space to invite. Most people will be able to see the depth of your friendship and understand why they might not have made the list, but it can also be nice to outright tell someone if you had wanted to invite them, but your budget just doesn’t allow it. Some coworkers become like friends and family, so it’s important to include them in your special events. You’ll want to send out your save the date with enough notice that they can get the time off work too if it falls during a weekday.
Be Upfront About Limitations
I find that being really upfront can be a great way to navigate inviting some coworkers but not others. By being direct about it, you’re ensuring that no one feels that you went behind their backs to invite others. Most people understand how financially exhausting planning a wedding can be, so a quick “I would have loved to invite you to my wedding, but unfortunately due to budget constraints we’ve had to keep our list very modest,” can make a world of difference. By speaking with them directly it shows that you’ve considered them and their feelings, and wanted them to be informed of why you’re unable to invite them. You’ll want to get clear about who you’re going to invite with a lot of notice so that you can send your save the date postcards with a lot of notice.
If You’re a Boss, the Rules Change
If you’re the owner of a company or the boss, then you might want to be careful how you proceed. If you’re in a considerable position of power, inviting only a few select people can be considered a little unfair or favoritism. For that reason you may be better off implementing an ‘all or nothing’ policy with who you invite. Depending on the size of your company or organization, this might be impossible from the get go as inviting everyone and their partners can make the numbers jump up extremely fast.
Don’t Forget Your Boss
In a formal workplace setting, such as an office environment, then it is often expected that you will at the very least invite your boss and their partner. If you work in a less formal environment, then there’s a bit more flexibility but you may want to consider how long you envision yourself working for that company. If it’s likely to be the long haul, then it’s probably worth inviting your boss to your wedding to strengthen your bond and to share your special day with them.
It can be very uncomfortable picking and choosing who to invite, especially when you would love to invite more people. Being upfront with your coworkers about why you can’t invite them, and acknowledging that with them, can do a lot for smoothing over the situation.